Rockstar go for the win

Now, I’ve written about the Bully/Canis Canem Edit “controversy” before. The game’s ‘out’ now, and it’s apparently OK (although it apparently has one of those terrible Stealth Missions that plague too many games right now). That’s not the point here, though.

What have Rockstar managed to get into the game that shouldn’t be controversial but somehow is? Well, they’ve built in a sideline teenage dating simulation that just so happens not to care about the sex of the kids doing the dating (which, of course, is something that you choose to do). So, of course, all the usual press is outraged at how Rockstar managed to get sexual content (well, kissing) into a ‘T’ rated game – missing the point that it’s mentioned on the back cover – and outraged about how your character could be gay or bi if you wanted him to be.

Wonderful. Now that’s comedy – this controversy is something I can entirely get behind Rockstar for, it’s entirely a player issue. It’s odd that this could well be the big issue of the game, though, when it’s the only real one Rockstar’s right on (and The Sims can do exactly the same thing), but that’s the press for you.

Daily Star ignorant; sun comes up in morning

Courtesy Media Guardian (free registration may be required):

The Daily Star last night pulled a page that mocked Muslim law by turning the tabloid into the “Daily Fatwa” following a newsroom revolt.

Well, doesn’t sound too promising from the title; sounds suspiciously like someone’s trying to be funny and failing miserably. Any details?

The page included a “Page 3 burqa babes special” showing a woman in a niqab, as part of a feature billed as “How your favourite paper would look under Muslim law”.

The page also contained a blank editorial stamped with the words “censored” and “Allah is great” while across the top of the page were the words “no news no goss no fun”.

A competition told readers to “Burn a flag and win a Corsa”, while a picture of the US president, George Bush, was accompanied by a caption “death to infidels”.

Oh dear. Not going into the complexities of Islamic law, but it does vary heavily based on religious interpretation; viz-a-viz the differences between Taliban-controlled Afghanistan at one end and the UAE on the other. Yesterday’s Guardian had a fine article in G2 by Zaiba Malik, who wore the niqab (Taliban-style one-fit full-cover garment) for the day, experienced the usual racism and despite trying hard didn’t find anyone else wearing it; she points out Quranic verses defending her non-niqab position.

One can safely surmise that whoever did write the Star article was, at the very least, a total fool, but glad to see that Star journos had the sense to use the union to right the wrong. It sounds very much like poor inaccurate stereotyping of the sort that simply pisses people off and gladdens the hearts of racists and other idiots. There are many valid reasons to criticise fundamentalist Islam, many of them the same as the reasons I criticise fundamentalist Christianity, but these aren’t them.

Quid pro quo

With the “Bully” saga going on and on and on, Rockstar have pulled a rather stunning coup on the British and world media. Now, of course, it’s backfiring on them.

The story so far: Rockstar Vancouver (not Rockstar North of GTA fame, the people who gave you the sequel to “Homeworld“) announce a game called “Bully“, and provide various screenshots of kids giving each other, eg, wedgies. People think it’s going to be a GTA-alike bully simulation game and raise hell.

Rockstar then pull off the wool to reveal it is, in fact, a school survival game in a very jocular 80s Grange Hill-esque tone. People, including the Daily Mail and people involved with anti-bullying charities, ignore the announcement and keep on raising hell. Rockstar repeat the announcement more forcefully, and change the name in European territories to “Canis Canem Edit” (“Dog Eat Dog”, the fictitious school’s motto.) You can guess it: people are still raising hell, despite the fact that the game is complete, has gone through the censors and come out with an ESRB “T” and (more importantly) BBFC 15; it wasn’t intended as a kids’ game anyway.

Now the latest announcement is that Dixons Stores Group is refusing to stock the game. Considering that they stock the 18-rated, gangs and sex and similar nasties GTA, and hope to stock more of it, that seems a bit much.

Admittedly GTA is popular because it doesn’t take itself remotely seriously (something which both Daily Mail type critics and people who rip it off don’t get at all), but from all the reports I’ve seen the same is true of “Bully“. So basically it’s DSG caving into a media backlash, the same way that Game caved over (Rockstar North’s actually distasteful) “Manhunt” a few years back.

Of course, “Manhunt” was back in Game mere months after they claimed to have removed it, so “Canis Canem Edit” will probably turn up on PC World shelves soon. Nevertheless, it’s the principle of the thing; if you’re going to ban games designed for adults from your shelves, ban them all, not just the ones that get coverage in the Metro. Journalists should realise that for some time the biggest demographic for games has been twentysomethings and older; this was true even back in 1995/6, and this group wants games that might actually cover adult themes (although they might not want all GTA all the time).

Rockstar are, of course, not blameless at all in the issue; they started it, and from the (for once, unintentional) controversy over Hot Coffee they probably knew what they were getting themselves into. But they did it anyway. No-one’s played the game yet; it might be crap for all I know, but the controversy will sell many more copies than the entire UK shipment of Psychonauts.

(And couldn’t they have just called it “Dog Eat Dog”? It’s a lot better.)

If it turns out to be a decent game, all well and good, but this kind of marketing can only be bad for gamers and gaming as a whole; making it seem like a “flash in the pan” medium. And the lack of games that cover adult issues well is very troubling. Nevertheless, gaming is a relatively infant medium rapidly growing up, and hopefully we’ll be at the stage that Psychonauts or a non-franchise game with a decent storyline and great gameplay can sell Big Numbers soon (XBLA, Steam and the Nintendo Wii might help here, and Bioshock looks like it could be interesting.) But we’re not there yet.

A rather oblivious howler

Simon Jenkins doing a “Damn those uppity scientists, having their profession destroyed by shitty “with it” GCSEs and chronic underfunding and having the cheek to protest about it” piece for the Guardian (I’m sure they employ him just to piss people off):

My own science O-level included trigonometry, advanced algebra and differential calculus, and related them to physics, engineering, statics and dynamics. I can not remember any of it, nor have I found the slightest use for it. I imagine more people use Latin than trigonometry.

Uh, Simon, quite a lot of people use trig – to take an appropriate example, if you’re pointing missile A at WMD facility B you’re going to need to work out what bloody angle it needs to point in. Is that a howler or what?

It’s a totally useless article on an interesting debate: as someone studying for a science degree entirely due to excellent teachers in high school, although in the much less compromised Scottish system (where combined science splits into chem/physics/biology at GCSE-equivalent rather than at A-level equivalent), I feel that people should have more opportunities to encounter science at school, whether segmented or not. At the same time, this science GCSE sounds terrible: whether it will actually be any good when taught is a different matter, but it doesn’t sound like it’s there to lay down the basics as a good intro science course should do. Shame, huh?

Incredibly, even the cesspool that is Comment is Free manages to produce an interesting comment discussion, proving that even it can be redeemable sometimes. And this is the kind of thing that Ben Goldacre usually has for lunch; if only the Guardian let him write more often.

You may have noticed…

…the new theme and logo. This is courtesy of wordpress.com adding a cut-down K2, and I really like the K2 style; the logo was made to fit into it, which it does much better than the old one. Thoughts welcome.

Chris de Burgh – the new David Icke!

No, really:

The 57-year-old, who is best known for his hit The Lady in Red, told TV host Gloria Hunniford of his gift.

During an interview on her religious show Heaven and Earth he confided: “I have found myself able to cure people with my hands.

“I met someone in the West Indies who was not able to walk. I put my hands on him and he was able to get up.”

Chris de Burgh? CHRIS DE BURGH?  The man who inflicted “Lady in Red” on us all can apparently cure people, instead of causing everlasting pain as it appears he usually does? Yeah, right.

What’s worse is that he’s actually apparently serious about this – according to a poster on the DVD Forums, he turned up on Aled Jones’s Radio 2 show and claimed he was surrounded by angels that protected him.

The last word on the subject, thankfully, will be provided by Bill Bailey via the medium of Youtube video:

Truth from fiction

Sony Europe’s Jamie MacDonald:

Q: What would you say to consumers who like Sony and want to buy your products, but perhaps feel that because they’re in Europe they’re always last in line?

A: European consumers have shown that historically they don’t mind that, because they end up buying as many PlayStations, if not more, than the US and Japan. In Europe, it doesn’t seem that the release of our platforms after the US and Japan – in the long run – affects how consumers feel.

In other words: “Europe will take it as hard as we want to give it to them.” Nice of them to admit it.

Sony’s PS3 strategy really is a disaster waiting to happen, and a lot of it is the fault of SCE marketing: arrogant and obtuse, managing to put out exactly the messages they’re trying to dispel. They claim revolutionary graphics; those “screenshots” that aren’t renders look like Xbox-360 screenshots, or only slightly better. They claim a full online environment; every manufacturer is making their own, just like with the PS2, and most probably won’t be Xbox Live level. They claim their controller is entirely original; but it’s just a Dual Shock without the shock and with a tilt, as opposed to the real Wiivolution (which manages both). They’ve even forced a pro-PS3 magazine to take down a video of the system booting up.

And, of course, Sony is still stuck in the Dark Ages of European Pricing, as they are with the PSP. £425 (for the 60GB model) does not equal $599 (the US price for the 60GB model), it equals $800; we’re being stiffed by over a hundred pounds at current exchange rates. It doesn’t equal €599 either, although that’s only a £25 extra Ripoff Britain stiffing by SCEE (how nice of them) – and that one can’t account for VAT either.

[In the meantime, the Xbox-360 HD-DVD drive is £119, which is basically the US price ($199) plus VAT. Microsoft are being friendlier to us than Sony. Now that’s weird.]

Of course, Sony can still rescue themselves if they make decent games and people decide that they want the console, but by the current look of things they really don’t deserve it. Especially since the PS3 isn’t “coming out” until March, although it isn’t really coming out until then anywhere (only 400,000 units to the USA = instant $2000 eBay sales, you can count on it.) But right now, they’re screwed, and they’re doing it to themselves. If only they hadn’t said it would be out this year, and if only they didn’t exaggerate or screw Europeans on pricing, things might be going better for them… might.

[via Engadget.]

Your privacy diminished, again

So we’ve just given in to the American demands for flight data.

Now, I can just about see why they’d want to know the names of people coming into their country, but they get that anyway when they look at your passport, along with DOB, a photograph of you, and currently biometrics of you as well. Why on earth they need to know whether you ate the fish or the chicken, or your credit card number, on the other hand… Isn’t that just overkill?

South West Trains have some bloody cheek

Anyone who’s ever had the misfortune to travel on South West Trains will have been rather aggrieved that they were allowed to keep their franchise, despite being one of the worst performing train companies in the country and despite the fact that many better performing franchises have had theirs taken away (eg. the National Express Scotrail franchise, which was awarded as best in the country a couple of times and still had their franchise taken away and given to First). They also have a big overcrowding issue: they control several of the big commuter routes into London and commuters loathe them (check out that “Megaplaint” Word document – wow!)

So what have they thought of to solve overcrowding? Bear in mind that SWT have brought in new trains that suck even compared to the new trains on other British lines. This is something they could, of course, have forseen, since it has been the most heavily overcrowded train company ever since its inception. What have they thought of?

They’re ripping out the seats.

Does Brian Souter have blackmail material on Blair or something? Honestly.